Monday, May 10, 2010

The Road to healing

Well... ya know I was feeling no pain, feeling fit and healthy and happy until they started to "fix" my cancer... and tomorrow we take the very scary step...the next step in healing, which will make me feel bleagh... Chemo.

Ahhh well first things first... my babies were wonderful to me over the weekend, particularly Sunday - Mother's day. Pity I was in so much pain. I think I knocked the drain bottle sutures, and I know one of my babies accidentally sat on it, pulling it again... so panadol wasn't doing it for me over the weekend.... and then Mic suggested I should cut down on the 4 hourly panadol... hmmmm easy for him to say huh.
I tried... and I cried... and it hurt... and I was miserable...I was tired, but I got out for a walk on Sunday... don't know if that made the owie worse...
I was getting the drain out Monday morning, so no point getting all drastic Sunday night.... Couldn't even stay up to watch Webber win in Spain...but that meant my back was over lying flat by 5.30am

Follow up appt with the surgeon to remove the drain went well... got my doctor's certificate..."when do I want to go back to work... hmmm I dunno"   and he discussed all the tricky bits...
Did the kids know... the nicest kids can go feral
Sex... take time, and intimacy will return... talk, and love and laugh...
Family and work stuff
Wigs... I will be bald pretty soon. etc etc etc
Brilliant... once the drain was taken out (Mic said it was in about 20cm... OMG, no wonder I couldn't move my arm) I had instant relief... still muscular aches around the shoulder from the axillary clearance, but no sharp pain any more... that alone put a spring in my step, the sun was shining....and off to the imaging place to get the gated blood pool scan.
Had a lovely guy, doing the blood taking... he was sooooo gentle, and would be doing the CT and Bone scan on Friday too. Did not feel a thing, he put in a bung thingy in my arm - gave me something, I had to wait half an hour, then he took my blood and added the radioactive stuff to it... had to wait another 15 minutes until he reinjected my live blood, and put me under the big camera to take pics of how it was travelling to my heart. This test is to see how much the chemo affects my heart... what fun.

Reading some blogs of cancer fighters.... the hair thing comes to mind... of course mine is looking fab at the moment..
Hair

but they reckon with this cancer I will lose it within a week... well... I have had a shaved head before.... time to break out the clippers before the drains get totally clogged up with my mop. I offered to let the kids cut it - how often would kids get that opportunity (well I read that on one of the inspirational blogs I have been reading) but they looked at me a bit confused.
We shall get there.....  and now, for a night's sleep without a drain to piss me off or hurt.... yay
Ohhh and have cut back on panadol already. Did some Pilates moves... thinking about getting some stuff to keep me regular... hospital seems to clog me up.

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