Me ... today

Today's prompt for the Photo a day challenge I play is "You" so I thought I would vent a bit here with the pic I have selected for that...
I want to be strong.... like the tree
I want my roots to be deep... like the tree
I want my arms to be wide.... like the tree
I want to be flexible, bending with the wind when I need to ...like the tree
I want to give back to my world.... like the tree
I want my seedlings to grow and flourish... like my tree
I want to provide shelter and comfort to those who need it.... like the redgum
I want to live a long long life like the redgum.... and when my time is done... to become part of the universe again
  I can work towards that.... regardless of time

The waiting

Today was full of waiting... 

Waiting for the CT scanners to be ready and have a gap to fit me in.

Waiting for the nurses to jab me and probe me...  Denosumab jab and dexmethasone drip... Then leave the cannula in to head to radiology. The lovely nurses put a dressing on it, so I wouldn't bump it on anything... It was a bit sore... But I didn't faint! Woot!

Then waiting in the imaging waitin room... Fill out the paperwork, yes I've had a CT scan before with contrast, no I have not had any issues with the contrast solution...

Then into the room with the donut machine... Hehehe if only. At least all I had to take off were my earrings, ok that was a bit tricky with a bandaged hand! One scan then the contrast dye was injected into the cannula. Head on the foam pillow... Don't move..LOL

CT scan done....Then waiting to make sure there is no reaction from the contrast... All good, but yuck, I could still see my load in the cannula tubes...ewwwwww

It was a long nervous wait, finally got the call at 5pm, but it showed nothing...

He is still worried about the ongoing headaches, and I need to call back if I am still getting them over the next week, then it will be up to an MRI which is more detailed than the CT scan, which usually picks up up to 95% of mets. So now, we wait some more...

The interesting thing is I was given the dexmethasone to relieve any pressure there may be on the brain... After the Dex IV the head pain did subside ...hmmm but I forgot to tell him, as I was at the shops when he called......so Panadol osteo an endone to dull the pain, with some aromatherapy oils to help. Peppermint, basil, lavender and rosemary in an oil roller.

Here we are again

So, in for my denosumab, it's been a shit 4 weeks...the migraines are hanging around, and have even had to have maxalon to stem the nausea.
The physio has been working on my neck and hips...magic...I can walk without limp, and can turn my head woot! Still no relief from migraines though.
Tell the nurse about the migraines, then the onc, and the ball is now rolling on an urgent CT scan..and a drip of my least favourite drug in the world...dexamethasone.
So now just waiting to go up for the scan!

Purple is for cyto toxic.... Oh joy, and that goes into my body!!!

Headache

I have had more migraine in the past 3 weeks than I have had in my life...leaving me a bit scared.

Of course, I have consulted Dr Google, and now I am more scared.... Massive debilitating migraines are a symptom of Brain Mets... With dizziness, and a feeling of being just off centre also... Yes, well couldn't they just be migraines from being dehydrated...after all the massive sweats... 

Ah well, I have my Cabrini appt on Thursday...so will make sure I let the oncologist know, and will worry about what is causing the pain when I see him...

I did wonder if the headaches/ migraine was coming from stress in my neck....so I have been having the physio work on this as well as my hips.

4 weeks goes so fast

Here I am, back at cabrini day oncology, for my 4 weekly denosumab jab! Miserable day outside, so peaceful in here, waiting to go in.
This month I can really feel the muscle pain from the rads. Feeling mega tired, but trying to work through it. Been walking more, and perhaps that has been causing my hip pain. I noticed yesterday that the painful area.of.my hip was also hot! Hmmmm.
Well, should have been a quick jab and out...but I wanted to see the onc, to see what he thought about the pain and heat.

my files and the nurse getting the denosumab


So off for an xray of my hip and pelvis....allgood, no evidence of further metastases, as i found  out the next day. i can start physio treatment to hopefully alleviate the muscle pain
!

Milestone....going strong

October 3rd....I turned 50...wow...at the start of the year I wanted a big 50th bash....but now that seemed too much effort, and I preferred to spend time with those close to me.

Still just a number...I have been busy celebrating life. 

An evening in town to see The Graduate with my wonderful man, also celebrating 25 years marriage.

Got my motorbike licence at last, no more L plates yay!

Back at work, and plodding away, it's a long term, and I'm already tired!

Blood test yesterday, xgeva next week... I am a bit concerned with my pain...particularly in my hip/lower back, but I have endone, and am taking that in the evenings, which gives me enough pain relief to go for a walk with Michael and Dexter. I love this time together, I love creating wonderful memories together.

I have been taking krill oil, and Wow, the bone and arthritis pain has hugely diminished, so now I can isolate my pain to more muscular. Probably from the rads! Although across my lower back are some tender spots. So now I can't work out if my muscle aches are purely from the rads, or exacerbated by the walks, a bit of both or?

So carrying on......

Ups and downs

IMy last post I felt had to be upbeat, as I wanted th focus on the positive, even though I was feeling bleagh!
It had been a crazy busy term at work. With my room being moved, I felt I was going backwards more than forwards, with stuff having to be moved sooner than anticipated, and the old room being knocked down arghhh! Chaos reigned supreme!
I was moving 40 years of stuff, trolley by trolley, lifting more than I should, totally whacked! Then I had a literal run in with a student who ran into my cancer stricken arm, causing extreme pain! Many tears, more endone and panadol osteo than I had taken in ages.
So sore hips, arms, overwork, feeling unsupported, run down, end of term, I was a mess.
Thankfully the term ended, and my clever sisters booked a weekend on Bribie in Queensland! Just what I needed. Chilled, laughter, good food and drinks! Great memories!

I had been attempting the bikram 4x4 challenge and was doing well until my meltdown...so I let it go... But 1 day back from my weekend away and back at bikram. Felt awesome! And I even managed to briefly balance on both legs in standing bow. Whoot, as well as touching my head on the floor!
Feeling great only a few joint aches which have been massively improved with starting red krill with glucosamine!
On top of things, and tumour markers down to 23 all good! Brilliant, just had my denosumab shot, everything is going well. Life is good.